Is art of conversation dying?

I frequently used to say to my kid, “Be a good boy”, “Behave yourself beta”. I was conscious and was very careful with the words and tone. Being a sensible parent never compared my child with other kids. One day I and my son went to supermarket and he wanted to buy something.  And with lots of love (like a good mother) going on my knees holding his both hands I said, “No beta not now. Be a good boy.” He kept looking at me and ultimately asked me, “Mamma how to be a good boy? How this good boy does looks like??? What do you mean by behave???”

This was shocking for me. So many years I am using this term and this poor guy doesn’t even know the meaning of this. . Then I explained this phrase in minimum 7 to 8 lines and then he smiled, gave me hifi and said, “So this means I am good boy, right mamma??” I hugged him and said, “Yes beta…You are...”

 Most of the times parents take kids for granted. They think that kids understand their terminologies completely. Forget terminologies they don’t even understand simple words. 

This incident happened in the era of no social networking.  Today one thumb up articulates everything but still comment makes us happy. This is our world - An adult’s world. How many times it happens in day that when child asks something and the response is in single word?? Eg. yes, no, lets c, humm, ok, wait or good beta or just a nod . The world of technology we are forgetting to converse. Only saying good or only thumb up doesn’t satisfy the need of appreciation of a child. If you want that our kids to develop good behaviour then when they exhibits it they need an appreciation with our enthusiasm and extra expression. Social networking sites have also come up with various facial expressions as it added up when a person writes comments. 

Let’s stop using phones, ipads, and head phones while talking to kids. Work can wait but childhood cannot. Technology has option of pause unfortunately it is not applicable on human beings.  Let’s have conversation with kids. These little conversations become memories for lifetime. Let’s relearn an art of conversation. Else the day is not far when our kids want to laugh they will just say: D. Human beings control technology lets not allow technology to control us.

and the show begins...

Young mothers always go through the conflict of balancing between extracurricular activities and academics for kids.  Especially in countries like India academics always take front seat. Our up bring impacts parenting and we tend to follow more academics for our kids which is a need of an hour. Many times we get to hear from elders and friends, “your kid is going to attend how many classes? Music, dance, swimming etc etc etc” and the thought bang in, “Am I being harsh on my kid.” And biggest challenge is kid’s mood swings. One month music, next month swimming and list is on. This is where the conflict between learning and finance begins.

Even my mother used to think in the same way. She was a teacher and sole earner in the family. I was not an exception to fickle minded kids. But  her budgeting made it very clear that I can attend only one class at a time. I started with kathak, harmonium, singing etc. In grade 5 explored theaters during summer vacation. There was a small institute named Shivaji Pratishtan in Pune and course fee was Rs. 150. At that time it was a tough decision for my mother. Regularity, excitement, sharing stories of the class were the signs of loving theater. I used to do whatever role used to come in my way. Due to dark skin I played a role of God Yama, became joker. Role of Cinderella never came in my way. Appreciation for unconventional roles gave me confidence and conviction of doing unusual things in life.   Then started working as child artist. But by class 12 I was no more a child. At the age of 18 received a state level best actress award and it was very clear for me what I want to pursue as my career.

In my mind the next step was television. One day doorbell ranged and four people entered. My small guest room was full. Immediately I got water to drink and stood in the corner of my house. I knew who were they and their purpose of the visit. Mom could not hide her anxiety. Looking at it one of them started praising my acting skills. And mom looked at me joyously and looking at not be missed opportunity they said, “We want to cast your daughter in the TV serial.” Mom looked at me with a smile and paused. I could hear that one long breath of hers and said, “Ok she can go ahead…”. Before she finished her lines I jumped from the corner to the center of the room with an excitement and said, “I knew this mom.” She completed her lines, “ but don’t come back…just pack your bags and go..” I was shock.  But a lady with strong principles could not go against the tide. The decision she made for small little girl was not suitable for young girl. That was the end of my dream.

After few years again I could see the same glare in her eyes when I did MBA and tagged as professor. Since then my classroom became stage and students became my audience. In professors role, wife’s role, mothers role I forgot that I ever wanted to be an actress.

Now after 20 years I am going to be on the stage.. going to hear three bells…that red curtain will slowly go up the lights will be on …and my mother has booked balcony ticket  for her 3 years back. On this occasion want to thank mom for investing those Rs.150 and also want to say, “ mummy don’t feel guilty of not fulfilling my dreams. Today I am performing role of mother and can completely understand. Thanks lot for developing this passion in me which gives me immense contentment and delight than anything else.”